A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. A man never worries about thefuture until he gets a wife.
Contented Married Life
A man was telling one of his friends the secret of his contented married life, “My wife makes allthe small decisions,” he explained, “and I make all the big ones, so we never interfere in eachother’s business and never get annoyed with each other. We have no complaints and noarguments.”
一個男人告訴他的朋友自己婚姻幸福美滿的秘密，“小事都由我妻子決定，”他解釋說：“而我只管大事，我們從不互相干涉，從不生對方的氣。我們從來沒有抱怨、沒有爭吵?！?br /> “That sounds reasonable,” answered his friend sympathetically. “And what sort of decisionsdoes your wife make?”
“Well,” answered the man, “she decides what jobs I apply for, what sort of house we live in,what furniture we have, where we go for our holidays, and things like that.”
“嗯，”那個人回答說：“她決定我申請什么工作，我們住什么房子，買什么家具，去哪里度假這些事情?！?br /> His friend was surprised. “Oh?” he said. “And what do you consider important decisions then?”
“Well,” answered the man, “I decide who should be Prime Minister, whether we should increaseour help to poor countries, what we should do about the atom bomb, and things like that.”
“嗯，”他回答：“我決定誰來當首相，我們是否要增加對貧困國家的援助，怎么處理原子彈等等這些問題?！?br /> 初一英語小笑話篇3
A Nail Or A Fly?
An old gentleman whose eyesight was failing came to stay in a hotel room with a bottle of winein each hand. On the wall there was a fly which he took for a nail. So the moment he hung themon, the bottles fell broken and the wine spilt all over the floor.
When a waitress discovered what had happened, she showed deep sympathy for him anddecided to do him a favour.
So the next morning when he was out taking a walk in the roof garden, she hammered a nailexactly where the fly had stayed.
Now the old man entered his room. The smell of the spilt wine reminded him of the accident.When he looked up at the wall, he found the fly was there again! He walked to it carefully adnslapped it with all his strength.
On hearing a loud cry, the kind-hearted waitress rushed in. To her great surprise, the poor oldman was there sitting on the floor, his teeth clenched and his right hand bleeding!