A high school senior was inspecting Harvard University, where he hoped to attend the following autumn.
As he was walking across the Quad, he stopped a distinguished-looking man and asked, “Sir, can you please tell me where your library is at?”
The man looked down his nose and replied, “Son, I’m head of the English department, and I can assure you we don’t end our sentences with prepositions. Re-cast your sentence in a proper form and I will reply.”
“Can you tell me where your library is at, jerk off?”
關于爆笑的英文笑話：Dinosaurs On Economics
Dinosaur #1: How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Dinosaur #2: What is an economist?
Dinosaur #1: A flunkie mathematician who tries to predict the population of kangaroos in Australia. But that’s not important and don’t ask what a Kangaroo is.
Dinosaur #2: I don’t know, how many?
Dinosaur #1: 10 economists and one grad student. One economist to make a model, one to run the regression, one to test the hypothesis, one to interpret the results, one to conclude how to screw it on, one grad student to screw it on, and five economists trying to fight off thedinosaurs trying to eat them.
關于爆笑的英文笑話：Support a Family
The prospective father-in-law asked, “Young man, can you support a family?”
The surprised groom-to-be replied, “Well, no I was just planning to support your daughter. The rest of you will have to fend for yourselves.”
Two elderly gentlemen from a retirement center were sitting on a bench under a tree when one turns to the other and says: “Slim, I’m 83 years old now and I’m just full of aches and pains. I know you’re about my age. How do you feel?”
Slim says, “I feel just like a newborn baby.”
“Really!? Like a newborn baby!?”
“Yep. No hair, no teeth, and I think I just wet my pants.
Late one night at the insane asylum one inmate shouted,”I am Napoleon!”
Another one said, “How do you know?”
The first inmate said, “God told me!”
Just then, a voice from another room shouted, “I did not!”