A little boy walks into his parents room to see his mom on top of his dad bouncing up and down.
The mom see’s her son and quickly dismounts, worried about what her son has seen. She dress’s quickly and goes to find him.
The son see’s his mom and asks’ “What were you and dad doing?”
The mother replies “Well you know your dad has a big tummy and sometimes I have to get on top of it to help flatten it.”
“You’re wasting your time.” says the boy.
“Why is that?” asked him mom, puzzled.
“Well when you go shopping the lady next door comes over and gets on her knees and blows it right back up.”
As John and his five year old son were headed to McDonald’s one day, they passed a car accident.
Usually when they saw something terrible like that, they would say a prayer for those who might be hurt, so John pointed and said to his son, “We should pray.”
From the back seat John heard his son’s earnest request: “Please, God, don’t let those cars block the entrance to McDonald’s.”
One weekend my friend Sally, a nurse, was looking after her six-year-old nephew when he fell off a playground slide and hit his head.
Worried that he might have a concussion, she checked him all night.
Every hour, she’d gently shake him and ask, “What’s your name?”
Soon, he began moaning in protest each time she entered the room.
When Sally went in at 5:00 A.M., she found something white on his forehead. Leaning close, she saw a crayon-scrawled message taped to his forehead.
It read: “My name is Daniel.”
關于爆笑兒童英文笑話：Hugging and kissing
MARC (age 4) was engrossed in a young man and woman who were hugging and kissing in a restaurant.
Without taking his eyes off them, he asked his dad, “Why is he whispering in her mouth?”
TAMMY (age 4) was with her mother when they met an elderly, rather wrinkled woman her mom knew.
Tammy looked at her for a while and then asked, “Why doesn’t your skin fit your face?”
BRITTANY (age 4) had an earache and wanted a painkiller.
She tried in vain to take the lid off the bottle.
Seeing her frustration, her mom explained it was a childproof cap and she’d have to open it for her.
Eyes wide with wonder, the little girl asked, “How does it know it’s me?
The students in my third-grade class were bombarding me with questions about my newly pierced ears. “Does the hole go all the way through?” “Yes.” “Did it hurt?” “Just a little.” “Did they stick a needle through your ears?” “No, they used a special gun.” Silence followed, and then one solemn voice called out, “How far away did they stand?”